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It's not just about the sneaky fivers your Dad bungs you whenever you visit: if your parents can afford to sub your studies, how much you get in loans and concessions could be affected by what's in the family coffers.
WHAT SHOULD YOU EXPECT FROM YOUR PARENTS?
For most students, the bank of mum and dad is as integral a part of the whole funding caboodle as their student loan and grant.
The whole student funding system relies on the expectation that parents who can afford to help will actually do so.
Rather than the parents or even the students, however, it’s the Government (through the LEAs or the Student Loan Company) that, in effect, makes the official decision about what parents can or can’t afford.
It won't matter two hoots what Mr MP says, if your parents have a change of (stone) heart and decide to make you pay for uni yourself. Mr MP can't get his mitts in your dad's trouser pockets (be thankful for that from all kinds of angles) and get you the dosh so it's up to Ma and Pa how many cookies from the cookie jar you get to munch on.
Let's see what kind of biccies your 'rents are likely to let you chew on:
Marks and Spencer Belgian Chocolate selection - Many parents are so proud that any son or daughter of theirs is going off to university that they’re only too pleased to fork out whatever they can.
Fox's Family biscuit tin (a few jammy dodgers and custard creams but some plain fare too) - Others want to know if there’s some particular amount they’re expected to provide – they don’t want to give too much and make you into the big spender at the student bar, but nor do they want you to be so hard up you can’t be a brilliant scholar.
Rich tea - Some parents, however, don’t place the same importance on university as others (or as you). Or they think that by the time you get to 18, they shouldn’t have to support you anymore. They might even think that not being supported after a certain age is an important part of your education.
Well-meaning and tasty crumbs - And some parents – many, in fact – may want to help, and the Government may expect them to, but they have too many other financial commitments and simply can’t afford it. (This is particularly likely if the family income drops for some reason.)
The whole student funding system relies on the expectation that parents who can afford to help will actually do so.
Rather than the parents or even the students, however, it’s the Government (through the LEAs or the Student Loan Company) that, in effect, makes the official decision about what parents can or can’t afford.
It won't matter two hoots what Mr MP says, if your parents have a change of (stone) heart and decide to make you pay for uni yourself. Mr MP can't get his mitts in your dad's trouser pockets (be thankful for that from all kinds of angles) and get you the dosh so it's up to Ma and Pa how many cookies from the cookie jar you get to munch on.
Let's see what kind of biccies your 'rents are likely to let you chew on:
Marks and Spencer Belgian Chocolate selection - Many parents are so proud that any son or daughter of theirs is going off to university that they’re only too pleased to fork out whatever they can.
Fox's Family biscuit tin (a few jammy dodgers and custard creams but some plain fare too) - Others want to know if there’s some particular amount they’re expected to provide – they don’t want to give too much and make you into the big spender at the student bar, but nor do they want you to be so hard up you can’t be a brilliant scholar.
Rich tea - Some parents, however, don’t place the same importance on university as others (or as you). Or they think that by the time you get to 18, they shouldn’t have to support you anymore. They might even think that not being supported after a certain age is an important part of your education.
Well-meaning and tasty crumbs - And some parents – many, in fact – may want to help, and the Government may expect them to, but they have too many other financial commitments and simply can’t afford it. (This is particularly likely if the family income drops for some reason.)
IS THERE A SPECIFIC AMOUNT I SHOULD EXPECT?
Rather than dictate or recommend a standard amount that all parents should contribute towards their blessed cherubs' further education costs, the government acknowledges that the amount of help your parents should and can give you depends on their financial circumstances and therefore how much you're getting from the SLC and the government.
The rough idea is that if you get a big, fat loan and grants package then that's because your family cannot afford to give you as much financial support as someone who receives a much smaller SLC booty because their parents can afford to make up the difference.
Basically thanks to some number crunching and sliding scales, all students should start on a more level playing field so that students with wealthier parents don't have an unfair advantage over those who couldn't afford university if their parents alone had to pay the costs. And who, apart from the fascists, said communism didn't work?
The rough idea is that if you get a big, fat loan and grants package then that's because your family cannot afford to give you as much financial support as someone who receives a much smaller SLC booty because their parents can afford to make up the difference.
Basically thanks to some number crunching and sliding scales, all students should start on a more level playing field so that students with wealthier parents don't have an unfair advantage over those who couldn't afford university if their parents alone had to pay the costs. And who, apart from the fascists, said communism didn't work?
BORROWING FROM PARENTS
There is a saying that goes something like, ‘to find your place in the sun you must first escape the shade of the family tree’.
But when you’re a student, all those hopeful delusions of independence and financial freedom will probably be shattered as, recovering from freshers’ week, you realise that all you have left is £19.63, an orange space hopper, one or two unidentifiable (and therefore inedible) items in the fridge and a pack of bic biros to last you the rest of term.
Depending on what Student Finance gleans from your income assessment, parents who are expected to top up your loan may well be expected to make further contributions towards your general living costs.
But if they’ve already doled out said dosh and you’ve then cheerfully frittered it away on nights down the students union, and more posters and plants than your cube of a room can fit, you could find yourself paying them a little cap-in-hand visit.
Of course, some students are fortunate enough to have wealthy/generous/understanding/indulgent (delete as applicable) parents who’ll douse them with cash like a misanthropic power-shower in times of financial embarrassment (let alone genuine monetary misery).
Even if you fall into this fortunate category, you wouldn’t want to take it for granted. You don’t miss the water until the well runs dry, as another saying goes.
And for every student who can rely on their parents for hand-outs, there are dozens whose parents can’t or (perhaps sensibly) won’t. If your parents are willing and able to help, borrowing rather than taking money from them seems like a sensible compromise – and who better to borrow from than parents?
They’re not likely to charge you any interest, they won’t come round and kneecap you if you miss the odd repayment and, sometimes – either deliberately or due to a touch of brain rot – they may actually forget about the loan altogether.
As it happens, the majority of students get some kind of handout from their parents. However, a relatively small proportion – only just over one in ten – reckon they’re expected to pay the money back. So don’t expect your parents to bail you out all the time. You don’t want to be a scrounger all your life, do you?
Money management means learning to make your budget stretch, to economise wisely and to provide for yourself whenever you need extra cash. Failing that, it means at least facing up to the consequences for yourself.
And, if they do offer you a nice long-term interest-free loan, a churlish refusal during your spell as a cash-strapped student may be extremely poor timing. Especially if it means you’ll only have to borrow the money elsewhere and borrow it more expensively. Just take it gratefully and gracefully and pay them back when you can.
Repaying this debt will probably be lowest on your list of priorities, but it’s still a debt. Unless they have unequivocally reassured you that they don’t want their money back (in which case, consider yourself a very fortunate person indeed), you should feel like a total turd if you go so far as to exploit your parents’ generosity.
Perhaps the most important thing when getting money – or not – off your parents is to set clear ground rules. Whether they’re giving you loans or hand-outs, it makes sense all round to establish exactly how much and how often they're planning on providing.
Not only does it make you feel less like a charity case and more like a maintained asset, it also gives you a much clearer idea of how much cash you are likely to have to play with.
A few more tips for wangling the wonga out of (sorry, maintaining a happy and harmonious financial relationship with) your parents:
Ultimately, not all parents are that much wealthier than their student offspring. They probably don’t feel overly chuffed at the prospect of not being able to help you out. So if this is the case, there’s nothing to be gained by making them feel bad about it. There are bursaries and emergency loans you can get from your university, which provide the kind of just-in-case cushion other students get from their parents.
But when you’re a student, all those hopeful delusions of independence and financial freedom will probably be shattered as, recovering from freshers’ week, you realise that all you have left is £19.63, an orange space hopper, one or two unidentifiable (and therefore inedible) items in the fridge and a pack of bic biros to last you the rest of term.
Depending on what Student Finance gleans from your income assessment, parents who are expected to top up your loan may well be expected to make further contributions towards your general living costs.
But if they’ve already doled out said dosh and you’ve then cheerfully frittered it away on nights down the students union, and more posters and plants than your cube of a room can fit, you could find yourself paying them a little cap-in-hand visit.
Of course, some students are fortunate enough to have wealthy/generous/understanding/indulgent (delete as applicable) parents who’ll douse them with cash like a misanthropic power-shower in times of financial embarrassment (let alone genuine monetary misery).
Even if you fall into this fortunate category, you wouldn’t want to take it for granted. You don’t miss the water until the well runs dry, as another saying goes.
And for every student who can rely on their parents for hand-outs, there are dozens whose parents can’t or (perhaps sensibly) won’t. If your parents are willing and able to help, borrowing rather than taking money from them seems like a sensible compromise – and who better to borrow from than parents?
They’re not likely to charge you any interest, they won’t come round and kneecap you if you miss the odd repayment and, sometimes – either deliberately or due to a touch of brain rot – they may actually forget about the loan altogether.
As it happens, the majority of students get some kind of handout from their parents. However, a relatively small proportion – only just over one in ten – reckon they’re expected to pay the money back. So don’t expect your parents to bail you out all the time. You don’t want to be a scrounger all your life, do you?
Money management means learning to make your budget stretch, to economise wisely and to provide for yourself whenever you need extra cash. Failing that, it means at least facing up to the consequences for yourself.
And, if they do offer you a nice long-term interest-free loan, a churlish refusal during your spell as a cash-strapped student may be extremely poor timing. Especially if it means you’ll only have to borrow the money elsewhere and borrow it more expensively. Just take it gratefully and gracefully and pay them back when you can.
Repaying this debt will probably be lowest on your list of priorities, but it’s still a debt. Unless they have unequivocally reassured you that they don’t want their money back (in which case, consider yourself a very fortunate person indeed), you should feel like a total turd if you go so far as to exploit your parents’ generosity.
Perhaps the most important thing when getting money – or not – off your parents is to set clear ground rules. Whether they’re giving you loans or hand-outs, it makes sense all round to establish exactly how much and how often they're planning on providing.
Not only does it make you feel less like a charity case and more like a maintained asset, it also gives you a much clearer idea of how much cash you are likely to have to play with.
A few more tips for wangling the wonga out of (sorry, maintaining a happy and harmonious financial relationship with) your parents:
- Monopoly Money: Instead of always asking for hard cash you could suggest that they either give you vouchers and tokens or buy for you whatever you would have bought with the money – books, clothes, tinned food, coffee, bus or train tickets, travel cards. Quite apart from the fact that it may feel less embarrassing for all concerned if no actual money changes hands, it will reassure your folks that their money’s going on stuff you actually need. (And to be fair, it does stop you spending it on stuff you don’t.)
- It's not your money: They can be idiosyncratic old things, parents, and might choose to kit out your bedroom with Habitat goodies or whisk you away on a plush family holiday at their expense. This is all very nice, as long as you’re not too embittered by the struggle to eke out one tin of beans for ten poverty-stricken meals to thank them for their extravagant gestures. A few helpful hints can go a long way but remember that, it’s their money and ultimately up to them to spend as they see fit.
- OSO (optimised spending opportunities): Why not get your parents to visit every now and then? They’ll feel loved and needed, which is all very nice, but more importantly you can often get them to take you out for a slap-up meal. After surviving on an uninterrupted diet of beans on toast, pasta, tinned tomatoes, beer and burgers, your stomach will be grateful for some proper nutrition and the brief departure from red-yellow-hued foodstuffs.
- Red alert funds: Parents may also consider getting a strictly ‘emergency use’ credit card or opening an emergency instant access account as a safety net, just in case. Stranger things have happened. Depending on the idea behind a gesture like that, you will presumably not want to abuse it. Just having something like that, however, can lift from your shoulders the ever-present panic at being completely without money or any means of getting any.
Ultimately, not all parents are that much wealthier than their student offspring. They probably don’t feel overly chuffed at the prospect of not being able to help you out. So if this is the case, there’s nothing to be gained by making them feel bad about it. There are bursaries and emergency loans you can get from your university, which provide the kind of just-in-case cushion other students get from their parents.